T0RN BETWEEN L0VERS

JUST TO BE CLEAR.....iM A VERY HONEST PERSON AND iM A STRONG BELIEVER IN MONOGAMY SO THERE iS NO CHEATiNG GOING ON WiTHiN THiS SiTUATiON.


iM USUALLY THAA TYPE WHO DONT GET iNTO RELATiONSHiPS UNLESS iM REALLY FEELiNG THAA DUDE. WELL i HAVE A BOYFRiEND WHOM i CARE FOR DEARLY iTS NOT LOVE BUT i LiKE DUDE ALOT. HE SAiD HE LOVE ME BUT i JUST DONT FEEL iT. i JUST FEEL DEEPLY FOR HiM. THAA WAY i AM i DONT REALLY BELiEVE WHAT iM TOLD THAT EASiLY. WHiCH iS SAD CUZ i MiGHT BE MiSSiNG OUT ON THAA BEST THiNG FOR ME VERSES MY EX FiANCE. WHiCH iS BACK iN THAA PiCTURE BUT EVERYONE KEEP TELLiNG ME TO KEEP HiM iN THE PAST. MY HEART WONT LET ME. iT TOOK ALOT FOR ME TO LET HiM GO AND NOW THAT HE BACK iTS LiKE DAMN i JUST WANNA UP AND LEAVE MY SiTUATiON THAT iM iN NOW BUT iTS NOT RiGHT FOR ME TO DO THAT. iTS LiKE MY BOYFRiEND HAS THAA POTENTiAL TO HAVE ME FALL iN LOVE WiTH HiM BUT iTS NOT HAPPENiNG NOW. MY EMOTiONS ARE SO EAGER TO FEEL SOMETHiNG AND SOON BUT iT MiGHT BE FOR THAA WRONG PERSON. I MEAN i LOVE MY EX WiTH ALL MY HEART. BUT HE BAD FOR ME. HE LiE AND CHEAT AND HE ABANDONED ME YET i WANT TO SPEND THAA REST OF MY LiFE WiTH HiM. i SWEAR BEiNG A GiRL FUCKEN SUCKS. i WAS SUPPOSE TO BE A MAN I SWEAR iWAS CUZ i ACT JUST LiKE ONE BUT MY EX BRINGS MY GIRLISH QUALiTiES OUT OF ME WHiCH COULD B GOOD OT BAD BUT AROUND MY BOYFRIEND I FEEL FREE TO BE WHO I AM. WHICH IS A BURPING FAT OBNOXIOUS GIRL WHO DONT CARE WHO'S WATCHiNG WHEN i DO SO. I JUST NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHiCH iS GOOD FOR ME CUZ i DONT WANNA PROLONG THiS ORDEAL CUZ iTS JUST GONNA HURT SOMEONE EVEN MORE iN THAA END.

ODE TO RAY J'S SONG MELODY

THiS iS SUCH A BOMB SONG. i JUST SiT AND ViBE OUT TO iT. RAY J REALLY CAPTURED HiS LOVE FOR MUSiC iN A SENSE OF IT BEiNG FOR A WOMAN. HE PUTS ON AN ILLUSION MAKiNG HiS AUDiENCE THiNK iTS A GiRL WHO HE FEELS SO DEEPLY FOR BUT MELODY iS HiS MUSiC AND HE LOVES iT SO MUCH. JUST THE WHOLE CONCEPT OF iT ALL iS SO CAPTiVATiNG

RANDOM BABBLES

SOME OF MY FRiENDS ASK ME HOW DO i GET iN THEE MOOD TO WRiTE SUCH DEEP BLOGS. WELL i JUST USUALLY ViBE OUT TO SOME MELLOW MUSiC. USUALLY ACOUSTiC LiKE SOME CORRiNE BAiLEY OR SOME HOPE. i LOVE CALM SOOTHiNG MUSiC WHiLE WRiTTiNG OR FOR ANYTHiNG ELSE OF THAT MATTER. BUT i JUST CENTER MY SELF AND FOCUS ALL MY ENERGY ON MY WRiTTiNG. iVE ALWAYS BEEN iNTO ENGLiSH AND POETRY AND JUST ANYTHiNG CREATiVE. iTS ALWAYS TiCKLED MY FANCY. i LiKE TO WRiTE ABOUT HOW i FEEL SiNCE i HAVE NOT A SOUL TO LiSTEN TO ME TALK ABOUT HOW i FEEL LMAOOO. MY CPU iS MY BESTEST FRiEND iN THEE WORLD CUZ iM TOO OUTSPOKEN AND REAL FOR FRiENDS. i HAVE ENTiRELY TOO MANY PPL WHO HATE ME CUZ i SPEAK WHAT MOST ARE AFRAiD TO. BUT iN THAA END iM HAPPY WiTH WHO I AM AND iF THEY DONT LiKE ME i DONT CARE CUZ REAL RECOGNiZE REAL

WHATS THAA CATCH?

SO iN TODAYS SOCiETY THERES THiS THiNG CALLED "FRiENDS WiTH BENEFiTS" OR WHAT i WOULD LiKE TO CALL FRiENDS WiTH BENNYS. SOME SMART MOTHA FUCKA CAME UP WiTH THAA CONCEPT OF HAViNG SEX WiTHOUT COMMiTTiNG TO ANY TYPE OF RELATiONSHiP. AS iF PREMARiTAL SEX iSNT BAD ENOUGH NOW SEX iS LOOSiNG iTS VALUE DAY BY DAY BECAUSE OF PPL AND THERE LACK OF COMMiTMENT AND MORALS. ME PERSONALLY i BELiEVE iN BUYiNG THEE COW iNSTEAD OF GiViNG OUT FREE MiLK. i MEAN YEA ONCE iN A BLUE MOON i MiGHT WiLDOUT AND HAVE AN ONE NiGHT TYPE THiNG BUT PPL THESES DAYS MAKE THAT A REGUALR TO JUST DO SOMETHiNG THATS SUPPOSE TO BE A SHOW OF EFFECTiON AND TURN iT iNTO RECREATiON. THERES SUCH A DECLiNE iN MOTiVATiON WiTHiN SOCiTY TODAY AND iTS HONESTLY HEART BREAKiNG. i MEAN COME ON NOW. PPL SAY THEY DONT WORK WiTH EMOTiONS SO THEY CAN DEAL WiTH iT BUT END UP BEiNG HEARTBROKEN AND ABANDONED DUE TO LACK OF KNOWLEDGE OF THEE OUTCOME OF DOING SO iN SUCH A LONG PERiOD OF TiME. iVE WiTNESS GOOD FRiENDS FALL ViCTiM TO FRiENDS WiTH BENNYS. iTS ALL FUN iN THE BEGiNNiNG TiLL HE FiNDS OR SHE FiNDS A REAL RELATiONSHiP FROM SOMEONE ELSE AND UR SUCK LOOKiNK STUPiD. i FEEL iTS A WASTE OF TiME AND ALL KINDS OF UNNESSECARY EMOTiONS. SO PLEASE i ASK YOU TO TAKE HEAD TO MY WORDS AND REALLY THiNK ABOUT WHAT U GET iNTO BEFORE U DO ANYTHiNG TO HURT YOURSELF OR OTHERS

Confessions Of A Broken Heart

i BELiEVE i SPEAK FOR EVERY LiTTLE GiRL WHO EVER WiSHED TO BE iN LOVE AND DREAMS WHERE SHATTERED COMPLETLY BY A BOY WHO WHAT THOUGHT TO B THAT PRiNCE CHARMiNG.

ONCE UPON A TiME i WAS iN LOVE WiTH A BOY. HE WAS MORE THAN WHAT MOST CONSiDER AMAZiNG. YOU KNO HOW iT iS WHEN U LiKE A BOY AND U WANNA TELL HiM THAT HE MAKES YOUR STOMACH DO NUMEROUS BACK FLiPS AND HE iS ALL YOU THiNK OF BEFORE U GO 2 SLEEP AND YOUR FiRST THOUGHT WHEN YOU WAKE UP. BUT UR YOUNG AND DONT KNO iF THEY FEEL THAA SAME. BUT WiTH MY STORY i KNEW HE KiNDA FELT THAA SAME BUT i FELT i WASNT THAT iT GiRL. TiME AND TiME AGAiN i TRiED TO GO ABOVE AND BEYOND THAA CALL OF DUTY JUST TO SHOW HIM HEY iM HERE FOR U i WANT YOU. BUT HE SEEMED TO ALWAYS HAVE A NEW GiRL. ALWAYS ANOTHER AND NEVER ME. BUT FOR YEARS i WOULD HOLD ON WAiTiNG FOR HiM 2 COME AROUND. HE WOULD ALWAYS FiLL ME UP WiTH HOPE THEN THE NEXT HE WAS WiTH A NEW GiRL. KiSSiNG ON HER. LOViNG HER AND NEVER ME. i WAS A FAiTHFUL REBOUND TO HIM. NOW i KNO U PROBABLY THiNKiNG LiKE HEY SHE A DUMB BiTCH. BUT iM NOT i WAS JUST A GiRL WHO THOUGHT SHE FOUND MR RiGHT AND HE WAS LOOKING FOR MRS. RiGHT NOW. SOMETiMES PPL COME iN YOUR LiFE AND ARE ONLY SUPPOSE 2 B THERE FOR A SEASON BUT SOME JUST LiKE ME MAKE THEM STAY LONGER THAN RECOMMENDED. BUT ALL IN ALL WE ESTABLISHED A BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP. ALL THAA TEARS AND YEARS MADE US AN UNBREAKABLE BOND. NOT A RELATiONSHiP BUT A LiFETiME FRiENDSHiP. HE WiLL ALWAYS HOLD A BiG PART OF MY HEART. I WILL ALWAYS LOVE HIM